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Bif has come a long way to get to where she is today. Being a female in the music industry, often it's hard to earn respect and you have to prove yourself. With Bif's attitude and dedication she earned her spot on AbsoluteDivas. Bif is a great musician, a great vocalist, and a true diva!
As a special feature we have a biography actually written by Bif herself. So please enjoy, as you learn about the life of a wonderful vocalist, and a commited artist.
The following is written by Bif Naked:
ONCE UPON A TIME IN A LAND FAR, FAR, AWAY (INDIA) TWO YOUNG, AMERICAN MISSIONARIES
HEARD THAT A CHILD WOULD SOON BE BORN AND GIVEN UP FOR ADOPTION. THE BIRTH
MOTHER (A CANADIAN TEEN) WAS BANISHED TO A MENTAL HOSPITAL TO HIDE HER
PREGNANCY. WHEN IT WAS TIME TO GIVE BIRTH SHE WAS FLOWN TO A HOSPITAL IN
NEW DELHI. I WAS BORN AND THE TWO MISSIONARIES ARRIVED AT THE HOSPITAL
WITH GREAT EXPECTATION AND ANTICIPATION, ONLY TO FIND THAT I WAS HANDED
OVER WITH NO DOCUMENTATION OR PROOF OF OWNERSHIP. HENCE MY LIFE WITH MY
PARENTS BEGAN. TWO YEARS OF WAITING TO LEAVE THE COUNTRY, FINALLY THE INDIAN
GOVERNMENT PROVIDED A BIRTH CERTIFICATE THAT SAID ONLY "BABY G." WE IMMEDIATELY
DEPARTED FOR THE GOOD OL' U.S. OF A. MY ADOPTION BECAME OFFICIAL IN GETTYSBURG,
SOUTH DAKOTA. WE THEN LIVED IN MINNEAPOLIS, LEXINGTON, KENTUCKY, AND MY
POOR MOTHER SUFFERED MY FIRM BELIEF THAT SOPHIA LOREN WAS MY BIRTH
MOTHER AND WOULD SOMEDAY COME AND TAKE ME SHOPPING. MY LOGIC WAS BASED
ON THE FACT THAT I WOULD SHUN SNEAKERS FOR ONLY ITALIAN LEATHER BUCKLE
SHOES AND I LOVED PASTA MORE THAN HINDUSTANI COOKING.
IN MY 13TH YEAR, MY FATHER (A PROFESSOR OF DENTISTRY) TOOK A NEW TEACHING POSITION AND MOVED
US TO THE FROZEN TUNDRA OF CANADA. MY TEENAGE YEARS WERE "HELLACIOUS" (MY
POOR MOTHER) AND I TRADED MY BALLET CLASSES FOR ARCADE LOITERING AND SKATEBOARDING.
FINALLY, WHEN THEY PUT ME INTO A COLLEGE IN WINNIPEG, MANITOBA, THEY BREATHED
A SIGH OF RELIEF - ONLY TO DISCOVER (A FEW MONTHS LATER) THAT
I WASN'T ACTUALLY ATTENDING. IN FACT I WAS SPENDING MY DAYS REHEARSING
WITH A PUNK ROCK BAND AND GETTING READY TO TOUR!!! WE TOURED AND TOURED
AND I EVEN HAD SEVERAL LAPSES IN GOOD JUDGMENT (I HAD A RATHER LIFE ALTERING
"MOMENT OF WEAKNESS" AND BRIEFLY MARRIED MY DRUMMER). A SHORT WHILE LATER,
AND AFTER PLAYING WITH SEVERAL OTHER HARD CORE BANDS, I EMBARKED ON A SOLO
CAREER IN VANCOUVER, CANADA. THREE INDEPENDENTLY RELEASED RECORDS ("4 SONGS
AND A POEM" EP, "...
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(continued from above)
...
BIF NAKED" ALBUM, AND "OKENSPAY ORDWAY" SPOKEN WORD C.D._
AND MULTIPLE TOURS OF CANADA, EUROPE, AND EVEN THE U.S.A., AND I BEGAN
WORK ON "I, BIFICUS". THROUGH A MAZE OF RECORD INDUSTRY INSANITY WHICH
AMAZES ME TO THIS DAY, I WAS FINALLY ADOPTED BY MY FAMILY AT LAVA/ATLANTIC
AND "I, BIFICUS" IS COMING OUT IN AMERICA. THANK GOD FOR MY FAMILY!
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